The Importance of Being Earnest

by Oscar Wilde

First Act

Fourth Part

Scene. Morning-room in Algernon's flat in Half-Moon Street. The room is
luxuriously and artistically furnished. Lady Bracknell and Algernon go into
the music-room, Gwendolen and Ernest remain behind.
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Jack. Charming day it has been, Miss Fairfax.

Gwendolen. Pray don't talk to me about the weather, Mr. Worthing. Whenever
people talk to me about the weather, I always feel quite certain that they
mean something else. And that makes me so nervous.

Jack. I do mean something else.

Gwendolen. I thought so. In fact, I am never wrong.

Jack. And I would like to be allowed to take advantage of Lady Bracknell's
temporary absence. ...

Gwendolen. I would certainly advise you to do so. Mamma has a way of coming
back suddenly into a room that I have often had to speak to her about.

Jack. (Nervously.) Miss Fairfax, ever since I met you I have admired you
more than any girl ... I have ever met since ... I met you.

Gwendolen. Yes, I am quite aware of the fact. And I often wish that in
public, at any rate, you had been more demonstrative. For me you have
always had an irresistable fascination. Even before I met you I was far
from indifferent to you. (Jack looks at her in amazement.) We live, as I
hope you know, Mr. Worthing, in an age of ideals. The fact is constantly
mentioned in the more expensive monthly magazines, and has reached the
provincial pulpits I am told: and my ideal has always been to love someone
of the name of Ernest. There is something in that name that inspires
absolute confidence. The moment Algernon first mentioned to me that he had
a friend called Ernest, I knew I was destined to love you.

Jack. You really love me, Gwendolen?

Gwendolen. Passionately!

Jack. Darling! You don't know how happy you've made me.

Gwendolen. My own Ernest!

Jack. But you don't really mean to say that you couldn't love me if my name
wasn't Ernest?

Gwendolen. But your name is Ernest.

Jack. Yes, I know it is. But supposing it was something else? Do you mean
to say you couldn't love me then?

Gwendolen. (Glibly.) Ah! that is clearly a metaphysical explanation, and
like most metaphysical speculations has very little reference at all to the
actual facts of real life, as we know them.

Jack. Personally, darling, to speak quite candidly, I don't much care about
the name of Ernest ... I don't think the name suits me at all.

Gwendolen. It suits you perfectly. It is a divine name. It has a music of
its own. It produces vibrations.

Jack. Well, really, Gwendolen, I must say that I think there are lots of
other much nicer names. I think Jack, for instance, a charming name.

Gwendolen. Jack? ... No, there is very little music in the name Jack, if
any at all, indeed. It does not thrill. It produces absolutely no
vibrations. ... I have known several Jacks, and they all, without
exception, were more than usually plain. Besides, Jack is a notorious
domesticity for John! And I pity any woman who is married to a man called
John. She would probably never be allowed to know the entrancing pleasure
of a single moment's solitude. The only really safe name is Ernest.

Jack. Gwendolen, I must get christened at once--I mean we must get married
at once. There is no time to be lost.

Gwendolen. Married, Mr. Worthing?

Jack. (Astounded.) Well ... surely. You know that I love you, and you led
me to believe, Miss Fairfax, that you were not absolutely indifferent to
me.

Gwendolen. I adore you. But you haven't proposed to me yet. Nothing has
been said at all about marriage. The subject has not even been touched on.

Jack. Well ... may I propose to you know?

Gwendolen. I think it would be an admirable opportunity. And to spare you
any possible disappointment, Mr. Worthing, I think it only fair to tell you
quite frankly before hand that I am fully determined to accept you.

Jack. Gwendolen!

Gwendolen. Yes, Mr. Worthing, what have you got to say to me?

Jack. You know what I have got to say to you.

Gwendolen. Yes, but you don't say it.

Jack. Gwendolen, will you marry me? (Goes on his knees.)

Gwendolen. Of course I will, darling. How long you have been about it! I am
afraid you have had very little experience in how to propose.

Jack. My own one, I have never loved anyone in the world but you.

Gwendolen. Yes, but men often propose for practice. I know my brother
Gerald does. All my girl-friends tell me so. What wonderfully blue eyes you
have, Ernest! They are quite, quite blue. I hope you will always look at me
just like that, especially when there are other people present.

(Enter Lady Bracknell.)

Lady Bracknell. Mr. Worthing! Rise, sir, from this semi-recumbent posture.
It is most indecorous.

   * Next: Act I, Part 5

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The Scenes of the Play

   * Act I: Algernon Moncrieff's Flat in Half-Moon Street, W.
        o Part 1
        o Part 2
        o Part 3
        o Part 5
        o Part 6
        o Part 7
   * Act II: The Garden at the Manor House, Woolton.
   * Act III: Drawing-Room at the Manor House, Woolton

Transcription and organization by Jerry Stratton, for FireBlade
Publications. If you have any comments or questions, please let us know!
Jerry
jerry@acusd.edu
